This is my life

This is my life a journey not only for the standard things but my weight loss to become healthier and to be able to get pregnant.

I am going to be very honest and frank for this first blog. I hope that someone can benefit from this. It may be a long one though.

It all started a few years ago when I met the man of my dreams (but all stories start like this?). Any way I had been online on myspace of all places looking at people in my area. I found a man that had this picture of him looking over his shoulder at the camera, all the other pictures were of Superman and such, but I looked at that picture I thought this is the man for me. One picture and I knew. I started talking to him via emails and then the phone than finally he can to my house one very late night. Two days later I traveled 90 miles and stayed with him for the weekend. It was fast and I was so surprised I trusted this person so much. Every week that we had days off he would stay with me or I would go and stay with him. This went on for a few month and I decided I wanted the long distance part to be over so I planned on getting a job out there and he decided to look for a job out here, and guess who got a job where.

We ended up moving into an apartment only a few miles from work and decided to just to have children. Before we moved out I started having trouble with lack of period. From November to Janurary there was nothing. I took pregnancy test after pregnancy test all negative. I am one of those people that fear the doctor and so I just thought oh I got my period in Januray I am fine now. So time went on and I had my period on and off, it was never really that normal to begin with.

The first year went by and the summer was the same as the winter before. I lacked a period and thought I was finaly going to get to hae a child with the man I loved, but the same results. I went to a doctor and she tested my hormones. I did have a yeast infection but the hormones are perfect. I took it as there was just something else like my weight and of course I felt horrible. My weight went up and down.

Now I am back to no period (minus spotting) and I am trying to lose the weight for good this time. I am looking for a doctor that is going to do no than say you are fine and walk me out the door.

That is were I am now. I am trying to find myself in all of this. I feel like I have never really done things for me before now. I am going to try my hardest to lose 80 lbs. In one year. So we will see!

Here are some of the only full body pictures I have